...Pleasedon'thurtme.

I know, I know.

It's been like, 30 years since my last update. I don't even remember when my last weigh-in was. I could offer excuses, but to be honest, anything that I could say that'd paint me in an innocent light would be complete horseshit. (Side note: Really, BlogSpot? 'Horseshit' is a word, but 'BlogSpot' is a typo? Hilarious).

Here's a fact: I've been sucking out loud lately. I haven't been working out because school ate up the last half of my summer and by the time I got home in the afternoons, all I wanted to do was take a shower and pass out. Also, my brother just returned from a year in South Korea, so beer, quintessentially American foodstuffs and inactive afternoons of cartoon-watching were unavoidable.

Here's another fact: I go back to Santa Fe tomorrow, so things will change. I will have access to a free gym (though the sexy soldiers I've been ogling all summer will be replaced by dirty hippies) and I'll be buying my own groceries, assisted by some bitch who lost a ton of weight this summer herself and looks fabulous (and a little bit like Justin Bieber). So things will turn around. They have to.

And finally: I present to you, readerz, a short-term goal. By Thanksgiving this year (that is, November 25, 2010) I will lose 20 lbs. This is doable if I stick to my guns and stop being stupid. So this Friday I will be weighing myself for my personal benefit and on September 3rd, regular weigh-ins will resume. Thank you guys for being so supportive even though I've been so dedicated to being awesome at sucking. ♥